Ha a couple of jokes that are sooooooooooo stupid u just have to laugh! found them on random sites :) ah they fair made me giggle!


A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can I do?”

The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead.” There is a silence, then a shot is heard.

The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: “OK, now what?“



TWO MUFFINS

So there's these 2 muffins in an oven.

They're both sitting, just chilling and getting baked.

And one of them yells "God Damn, it's hot in here!"

And the other muffin replies "Holy Crap, a talking muffin!"


POSH FART

A woman walks into a shop that sells expensive Persian Rugs.

Looking around, she spots the perfect rug, walks over and inspects it.

As she bends to feel the texture of the rug she farts loudly.

Very embarrassed she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her 'little accident' and hopes a sales person does not pop up right now.

As she turns back, there standing next to her is a salesman. "Good day Ma'am, how may we help you today?"

Very uncomfortably she asks, "How much does this rug cost?"

He answers, "Lady if you farted just touching it, you're gonna crap your pants when you hear what the price is."


A QUICKIE PLEASE

A man goes into a restaurant and is seated. All the waitresses are gorgeous. A particularly voluptuous waitress wearing a very short skirt comes to his table and asks, "What would you like, sir?"
He looks at the menu and then scans her beautiful frame top to bottom, then answers, "A quickie."

The waitress turns and walks away in disgust. After she regains her composure she returns and asks again, "What would you like, sir?" Again the man thoroughly checks her out and again answers, "A quickie, please."

This time her anger takes over, she reaches over and slaps him across the face with a resounding "SMACK!" and storms away.

A man sitting at the next table leans over and whispers, "Um, Pal, I think it's pronounced 'quiche'."


COFFEE DILEMMA

A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.

The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee".

The husband said, " You are in charge of the cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."

Wife replies, "No you should do it, and besides it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee."

Husband replies, " I can't believe that, show me."

So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and shows him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says:

"HEBREWS"


MIKE IS DEAD

Two guys meet up in a bar. The first one asks, "Did your hear the news - Mike is dead??!!!"

"Woah, what the hell happened to him?"

"Well he was on his way over to my house the other day and when he arrived outside the house he didn't brake properly and boom - He hit the curb, the car flipped over and he crashed through the sunroof - Went flying through the air and smashed through my upstairs bedroom window."

"What a horrible way to die!"

"No no, he survived that, that didn't kill him at all. So, he's landed in my upstairs bedroom and he's all covered in broken glass on the floor. Then, he spots the big old antique wardrobe we have in the room and reaches up for the handle to try to pull himself up. He's just dragging himself up when bang, this massive wardrobe comes crashing down on top of him, crushing him and breaking most of his bones."

"What a way to go, that's terrible!"

"No no, that didn't kill him he survived that. He managed to get the wardrobe off him and crawls out onto the landing, he tries to pull himself up on the banister but under his weight, the banister breaks and he goes falling down on to the first floor. In mid air, all the broken banister poles spin and fall on him, pinning him to the floor, sticking right through him."

"Now that is the most unfortunate way to go!"

"No no, that didn't kill him, he even survived that. So he's on the downstairs landing, just beside the kitchen. He crawls in to the kitchen, tries to pull himself up on the stove, but reached for a big pot of boiling hot water, whoosh, the whole thing came down on him and burned most of his skin off him."

"Man, what a way to go!"

"No no, he survived that, he survived that! He's lying on the ground, covered in boiling water and he spots the phone and tries to pull himself up, to call for help, but instead he grabs the light switch and pulls the whole thing off the wall and the water and electricity didn't mix and so he got electrocuted, wallop, 10,000 volts shot through him."

"Now that is one awful way to go!"

"No no, he survived that..."

"Hold on now, just how the hell did he die?"

"I shot him!"

"You shot him? What the hell did you shoot him for?"

"He was wrecking my house."

An englishman, an irishman and a scotsman
An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar and each orders a pint of beer. When the drinks arrive they notice that all three pints have a fly in them.

The Englishman just looks at his pint in disgust and pushes it away.

The Irishman picks out the fly with his fingers, throws it on the floor and proceeds to drink his beer.

The Scotsman picks the fly out of his pint, and holds it over the drinking saying, "Come on you little git, spit it out!"

Well I had a really bad day yesterday at work. Some guy came in (4pm), totally out of his face, wanting to bring his phone back simply because he didnt like it, which would have been fine cause he had the recepit. I opened the box and there was BLOOD all over everything. I asked him why there was blood all over the box and he said he'd cut his finger on it when the girl (being Gemma) opened it. yeah i'm sure that's the story *rolls eyes* Anyway, I asked him what was wrong with the phone and he said nothing, so i then asked if the phone had been used and he said yes. Basically our return policy is - you've 14 days to bring a phone back unused and unregistered, and 28 days to bring a phone back if it's faulty with the receipt to exchange it for another phone. But this guy couldnt understand the fact that he'd used the phone, registered it, so not liking it was really tough. The whole thing was covered in blood. I asked stuart if he was able to authorise the returning of the phone, but apparently he's not allowed to do that any more, so i called jamie over. Jamie took one look at the box covered in blood and he said there was no way we were taking it back because it meant we were unable to re-sell it covered in blood. Plus the thing was in a right state anyway. So Jamie said we werent taking it back, the guy got aggressive....

man: 'if it's the blood thats a problem i'll get it off, here'(he was shouting and getting angry).... then he throws the contents of the box at me, grabs the box and wets his sleeve as he attempts to wipe the blood off. I stood well back from him cause he looked like he could easily lash out at any minute. Was scary :( Jamie then walked away looking really angry. Pat and him were standing by the poster stand keeping an eye on him. Stuart was standing next to me, but he couldnt do much as he was serving a customer..trust me to always get the annoying ones. Anyway he insisted on seeing the manager, but John wasnt in, the other manager had gone on a conference call and there was no way i was disturbing her. I said that i wasnt going to interrupt the conference call as it was extremely important. So the man asked how long it would be, so i said well most conference calls can take between half an hour and an hour, but it could be longer. So the guy said he would wait. Fair enough, he waits but continues to go on and on about the damn phone. Eventually i said to him 'look i can go and get the assistant manager off this conference call if it's possible. I cant promise anything but i will try my best'. So i walked over to the office, opened the door, but she was still on her call so i didnt bother asking her. I stood and spoke to pat, but was scared of going back to the counter... this guy was getting violent and couldnt take no for an answer. Anyway, i went back over and said that she was on the conference call. The guy starting making accusations that i'd told him to shut up, which i never did. He then changed his story and said that the blood was now 'paint' and said he hadnt actually cut his finger on it, so apparent i made that up too. He was really pissing me off anyway and was disrespecting me, so i said to him, 'look, at the end of the day it's you bringing the phone back so i suggest you start respecting me if you would like me to do anything about it' he started moaning blah blah blah so i said 'excuse me, i dont appreciate people talking to me like that' and he really did get me started, but i wasnt taking shit from no drugged up moron. He told me that he had some doctors appointment about 5:15, but by 5:30 he was still in the building. Pat had said that he could move of his own accord, but if he didnt she would be forced to get the police to move him on. I was stuck with some awkward customer saying he wasnt going to wait until the next day to come back as he was up in court in Edinburgh, and if he missed that he would have me personally go and explain to them why he was late. Yes, like i will take the blame for something i hadnt done. If he didnt get stroppy and violent in the first place then maybe i would have had a little more patience to deal with him. Anyway the fact he started making accusations was bad enough, but at the end of the day i had Stuart, Jamie, Pat and a few customers as my witness. I tried to deal with him the best i could, but nooooooooo he still had to be a right git towards me. Anyway, i got away a couple of mins early cause i was gonna buy something, i came back down and the guy started talking to me, so i said to him 'look, this is a work matter and as i have officially finished i am not going to have this conversation with u' then he wanted me to do something about his phone, but i said 'I cant do anything and I wont be doing anything' then i just ignored him. But of course, you know as they do, this git pulled a fast one. I left the phone sat on my till, then he claimed to have lost the thing, so that means he wasnt going to move after everything, and i certainly wasnt staying to help the git find his phone when he'd probably slipped it into his pocket.

The end. Thanku for wasting your time reading a crappy eventful day of my working day.

Last night was great fun. I met up with a few friends - Dawn, Sophie, Fiona and Becca, then later on met up with Gillian and we saw Jess. Anyway, we went out into a load of clubs which was fun. Did heaps of dancing, singing & a lil bit of drinking! Overall the night was fun. Got home around 3am then stayed up and once again attempted to watch Wallace and Gromit movie thingy. I keep falling asleep. Suppose that serves me right for watching it when i am sleepy! It was great to go out again - there's always a great atmosphere =o) Will do it again sometime.

AND NOW at this second in time i am very confused!!

+kiss on the ear--------------------"i'm horny"

+kiss on the cheek-----------------"we're friends"

+kiss on the hand------------------"i adore you"

+kiss on the neck-------------------"we belong together"

+kiss on the shoulder--------------"i want you"

+kiss on the lips---------------------"i love you" or "i want you"

+holding hands-----------------------"we can learn to love each other"

+a wink---------------------------------"Let's get it on"

+slap on the ass---------------------"thats mine"

+playing with the ear----------------"i can't live without you"

+holding on tight---------------------"don't let go"

+looking into each other's eyes---"let's get romantic"

+playing with hair on head---------------"tell me you love me"

+arms around the waist -----------"i love you too much to let go"

Woah major long time since i updated my journal.. sorry people :O I'm still alive and i'm still here to post my random posts that i tend to post =\ *thinks* i think that made sense.

Anyway you've not been missing much in the land of Abby, simply because i haven't really been up to much. Ummmmmmmm I went out with a few friends into a few clubs, pubs etc, you know, like you do.. teeheehee! fun fun! And yes, i remember everything AND i wasn't drunk *pats head*

I saw Eric the other week (thank god) i was starting to feel my world was empty! It felt empty not being with him anyway. He's such a hottie :p Saw a couple of movies - that memoirs of a geisha and that cock and bull story.. yadda yadda yadda!

Um i've also been doing heaps of thinking lately. Certain events have caused me to be rather pissed off.. simply because of a few texts from someone who basically fucked up my life! Yes.. i will end that there before i start getting emotionally upset... but that certain event was what caused me to be quiet, aggrivated and upset.......so i'm really sorry if anyone got the scary side of me for a bit!

Valentines day coming up! Must remember to give eric his card :O i will try not lose the thing between now and tuesday. I was gonna post it to him, but the post tends to be unreliable at busy times. I aint a massive fan of such holidays really, but i believe in love and being made to feel great. Cant wait to see Eric again, i really really miss him! Everyone seems to know im a loving person and i enjoy my cuddles, kisses, holdin hands - such the lil romantic princess! So I will ensure the people i love are happy too!

BEDTIME for me! up for work in a while, gah!
Night xxx

The coffee debate...

Once upon a time there lived Nick who loved coffee, but then again on the other hand, there lived Abby (moi) who cannot stand the look, smell or taste of the stuff... one devestating evening the debate on deciding whether coffee was civilised or evil began... unfortunately the evil smurfs made me give in and let nick win.... here's how it goes...


RaR says:
coffee is evil
VoodooFrog says:
You could be coming down with something.
RaR says:
oh great, again
VoodooFrog says:
Coffee is civilization.
RaR says:
coffee is evil
VoodooFrog says:
Civilization.
RaR says:
evil
VoodooFrog says:
Civ.
RaR says:
evil
VoodooFrog says:
Civ
RaR says:
evil
VoodooFrog says:
Where's my pox-civ-ing light-civ-er???
RaR says:
i dont evil know evil! EVIL! EVIL EVIL!!
RaR says:
*COUGH* EVIL*
VoodooFrog says:
CIVILIZATIOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNN!
RaR says:
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVIL MUHAHAHAHAHA
VoodooFrog says:
Without coffee nations would collapse!
RaR says:
with coffee nations will experience evil
RaR says:
think of all the poor trees that have died
VoodooFrog says:
I think that would pretty conclusively happen with or without coffee... but without coffee, doctors who have to work extremely long shifts will have to resort to more dangerous methods to keep themselves alert.
VoodooFrog says:
Trees?
RaR says:
that's right, bring the NHS into it
RaR says:
yep.... trees.. to um...MAKE THE LABELS ON THE COFFEE JAR
VoodooFrog says:
How do you know it isn't recycled paper. Possibly recycled glass too.
RaR says:
because coffee label makers aren't tight
VoodooFrog says:
It's not about being tight, it's about being enviro-friendly.
RaR says:
i know =o( *sniff* just didnt know what to say to your intelligent answer


the end !

EDIT

here's what happened when i couldnt reply to nick the coffee obsessed drinker's comment


RaR says:
agh it wont let me reply to that
VoodooFrog says:
lol Why not?
RaR says:
dunno
VoodooFrog says:
Hrm.
VoodooFrog says:
Must be gremlins.
RaR says:
smurfs
RaR says:
toads
RaR says:
cheese
VoodooFrog says:
Marshmallows?
RaR says:
AHA! u have it sussed
RaR says:
it would explain a lot
VoodooFrog says:
Kittens, planks, jam, craters, helicopters, shoes, nosehair, a brick and two packets of badger shavings??
RaR says:
PLANKS? hell yeah that's it
RaR says:
here's what happened...
RaR says:
the plank provided a platform for the marshmallow... the marshmallow jumped, hit the lever and BANG now it's stopping me replying because the lever thing went on strike and the marshmallow got electrecuted so therefore cannot move because it melted and jammed the whole system... then... the jam looked like blood, so we had to call the police in to investigate the scene... but by the time the polic
RaR says:
e got there, the kittens had eaten it and been taken away by the helicopters?
RaR says:
that sound about right? =\

After being sent a nudge to remind me i'd not updated for 2 weeks, i thought i'd make an appearance here. I guess i've just been really busy lately with work, shopping, going out... not had much time for this..

Recent Events include going to the cinema with friends to see Chronicles of Narnia the other week, I saw Eric, been shopping, working and generally lazing around. Tomorrow is my dads birthday so i've yet to wrap his presents. I dont have much to say other than that, so i'll leave it there until i do have something to say, otherwise it's just taking up valuable space.

HAPPY CRIMBO everyone =o) Hope everyone had a great time. I had a great day......i suppose i better give a run down of events that have been taking place...

Xmas eve - had to work unfortunately but i suppose it was a good laugh. And the manager decided that we were getting out at 6pm rather than 7, simply cause he wanted us all to go to the pub for a crimbo drink hehe, but i wasnt feeling too great so i didnt go. Just wanted to go home.

Anyhow had family round for xmas dinner and my sis and her boyfriend managed to come round too so it was great fun. Got lots of lovely things but there's still no sign of snow.

Yesterday i was at the doctors :( *was meant to be back at work* but i was ill. Found out i had a really bad throat and chest infection, so i wont be drinking over the new year and i doubt i'll feel up to doing anything. It's painful :( Anyhow was also meant to be at work today and tomorrow, but the doctor told me to take another 2 days off, so i'm sat about the house watchin a heap of dvds i got for xmas, and spending time with family. I suppose it's nice to relax. Should be back to work on saturday though.

Eric will be back from Holland soon, so i'll get to see him! missing him soooooooo much. Can't wait to give him a massive cuddle and make him smile :) love ya honey!

Tonight i'm stuck in the house by myself. Everyone has gone over to my sisters house, but cause i'm ill, i'm staying put... probs for the best really, dont want to give everyone my nasty cough!

A couple of nosey bits of information to let everyone know a bit more about yourself.

Name: Abby

Age: 18

Date of Birth: 20th March 1987

Music: The Killers, Hoobastank, Greenday, Snow Patrol, 3 Doors Down, Blur, Embrace, REM, Kelly Clarkson, James Blunt, Daniel Powter, Good Charlotte, Franz Ferdinand, Kaiser Chiefs, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Bryan Adams, Coldplay, Michael Jackson, Nickleback

Fav songs: Hoobastank – The Reason
Three Doors Down – here without you
Kelly Clarkson – Behind these hazel eyes
Michael Jackson – Earth Song
Whitney Houston – I will always love you - all these songs mean something to me that’s why!

Fav colours – Pink, purple, black & blue

Fav foods – Chicken Tikka Masala, Chicken Korma, prawns, strawberries, salmon

Sun or snow? – SNOW!! Love the snow!

Are you in a relationship? – Yes

Have you ever cheated on someone? – Ugh no that’s mean!!

Are you happy in your relationship? – Yeah, very happy thanks

Cuddles or kisses? - BOTH! (From Eric)

Money or love? – Love, better any day!

How long have you been with your current partner? Urrrrm since Aug 4th

Favourite Disney character – TIGGER! BOUNCEY BOUNCEY!! Wooo

Who do you love? – Eric of course

Have you ever been in love? – Yes

Are you happy with the way you look? – no, so don’t get me started

If you could change one thing about yourself what would it be? – where do I start?

Favourite drink? Irn bru all the way !

Favourite animal? Bunny rabbit J

If you could have any pet, what would it be? I’d get me a tiger and call it tigger

Have you ever cried over a guy? – yes, end of!

When was the last time you cried? – yesterday =\

Why did you cry? – something I don’t want to discuss thanku

If you were on a desert island, what three things would you want with you? – my boyfriend, blanket, my wee zen.

Favourite place – under the stars, the beach or my bed

Dislikes – selfish people, racism, being too hot, animal testing, killing, liars, being lonely, boredom

Ever had a serious illness? Ummmm not that I can think of

Have you ever had an operation? – nope, never been to hospital

Last dream you had? – I cant honestly remember, twas ages ago I’m sure of that much!

Would you trust anyone with your life? I’d trust my boyfriend and my closest friends, most of my family

Thing that hurt the most? Death of family members

Thing you regret most? – going out with a right prat who wrecked my life

Biggest secret ? – I don’t really have any secrets to be honest. If people want to know things they ask and I generally tell

What would upset you? – a few things - death, lies, being cheated on

If you look out of your window, what do you see right now? – the moon
What are you thinking about? – how much I miss eric and how much I wish I was with him. Oh and what to get everyone for Christmas…

Are you willing to answer any more questions? NO! tis almost 3am! Time for bed :P

Well, what a week i've had. But today i finally managed to relax a bit. I've been doing a lot of thinking lately, some of it's not good, some of it will be difficult to deal with, and the rest, well i suppose what i thought about will take some time. That's a lot of thinking!

You don't realise how much you miss someone until they aint around. I miss Eric when i aint with him, hell i even miss him when i am. Suppose it's kinda difficult to think that i wont actually see him now until after the new year. The only days off i have between now and 7th january are Tuesday 13th, sun 18th, xmas day, boxing day and the day after, new years day, wed 4th and saturday 7th jan :( bit evil really. I know he will be in holland for most of it, then the other days probably back at uni. So unfair.

I appear to have abandoned my journal lately. I've just been so so busy the last couple of weeks, working, working and more working. The run up to Christmas is a bit chaotic really, but it's good fun and i'm ejoying it a lot more. I ordered a dvd the other day which arrived in the post this morning - Born to fight. Saw it at the cinema a few months back and i found it good so i bought it.

Anyway, yesterday i spent the day with Eric which was good. Saw a couple of movies and went in a few shops. It was absolutely freezing though so i felt pretty crap. Was having such a crap day yesterday (not because i was with Eric) cause i just felt awful i suppose. It was good to see Eric though =o)

To be honest, i've not really done much lately. I'm so tired. Starting work at 7:30am tomorrow and i dont finish till 6.. then i'm going late night shopping so i will be knackered by the time i get home!!

Anyhow, almost sunday so i will be off. Sleep in! yay!! Then i am off again on Tuesday so that will be good. Just gotta find something to do :O Any ideas please fire them at me! Decent ones only :P

Is it so wrong that i hate being lied to? Everyone is lying to me and they just sit there hoping i won't notice... but i do. I aint stupid and i can tell when someone is lying! Had such a crap day today, nothing seems to have gone right at all.
Work sucked big time, i froze to death, had no sleep, no breaks... i could go on? I get in, and i have no evening to do anything. Got to start work at 8:30 tomorrow morning, which is pretty early and i finish at 5. Just thought i'd update this before i go to sleep. Probably not the best idea cause i'm pretty pissed off. I apologise for my unusual anger, but i cant help it. Everyone is annoying me and i wish they'd just leave me alone! Suppose my mood is a reflection of this really bad day. *sigh*

Another one of those forward things someone sent me... some good suggestions i guess =o)

>> >>things you should try on your boy/girl friend..
>> >>
>> >>Hold their hands whenever you possibly can.
>> >>__________________________________________
>> >>
>> >>Put your arms around their waist and whisper in their ear.
>> >>__________________________________________
>> >>
>> >>Kiss them every chance you get.
>> >>__________________________________________
>> >>
>> >>Hold them close when they're cold.
>> >>__________________________________________
>> >>
>> >>When you are alone hold them close and kiss them.
>> >>__________________________________________
>> >>
>> >>Kiss him/her on the tip of their nose (it will give them the hint that you want to kiss them.)
>> >>__________________________________________
>> >>
>> >>While in the movie, put your arm around her and then she will automatically put her head on your shoulder.. then lean in and tilt her chin and kiss her lightly.
>> >>__________________________________________
>> >>
>> >>When they complain that their neck/shoulders hurts massage it for them.
>> >>_________________________________________
>> >>
>> >>When people diss them stand up for them.
>> >>_________________________________________
>> >>
>> >>Look deep into their eyes and tell them you love them.
>> >>_________________________________________
>> >>
>> >>Lay down under the stars and put her head on your chest so she can listen to the steady beat of your
>>heart and link your fingers together while you whisper to her as she rests her eyes and listens to your voice..
>> >>__________________________________________

guess reading that just makes you wish you could be with the person you love at that very moment... I certainly wish I was...

Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire was absolutely amazing! I aint sure everyone would agree really, but I thought it was great! Much better than the other 3. So much action and great effects. Fantastic!

Just been scanning through some new emails and i came across this from someone. It's one of those annoying forward things that people tend to send to at least a thousand people at a time, and i just happened to be one of them! But i read it anyway, and it's so true.. everything said below is true to me when i do something it shows the exact thing it says.. how weird. I just thought i'd share it with anyone reading this....

>When a GIRL is quiet, Millions of things are running in her mind.
>
>When a GIRL is not arguing,She is thinking deeply.
>
>When a GIRL looks at u with eyes full of questions,She is wondering how
>long you will be around.
>
>When a GIRL answers "i'm fine" after a few seconds,She is not at all fine.
>
>When a GIRL stares at you, She is wondering why you are lying.
>
>When a GIRL lays on your chest, She is wishing for you to be hers forever.
>
>When a GIRL wants to see you everyday, it shows she cares and misses you
>
>When a GIRL says I love you,She means it.
>
>When a GIRL says "i miss you", No one in this world can miss you more than
>that..

Today I was also working... I finally built up the courage to tell my manager that i wasn't enjoying entertainment at all at work. I guess cause i was thrown in at the deep end on a really busy day not knowing anything was a bit stressful really. Anyway.. John (manager) asked Kim (boss of entertainment) to explain the whole filing system to me and where everything was and it made so much more sense. I was a lot happier today, and I actually quite enjoyed it. Think i will grow to enjoy it really... here's hoping.

What a crap day.
I went from loving my job, to hating it in the space of a 3 weeks. Today someone left the company. The manager approached me this afternoon informing me he had great news and a great job for me. Of course, me thinking that would be the truth, it turned out it was the thing i least wanted to do. Yes i love my music and i love entertainment, but i've been shoved on entertainment counters and in that department. I just hate it so much! I love helpin people and spendin time in the rest of the shop, but not entertainment. I was so bored today and hated every minute. Problem is, dunno what to say to my manager really about it. He's easy enough to talk to. Everyone else felt really sorry for me cause they know i hate it. Spent a while talking to Jamie and Elizabeth about it.. just hope something is done about it... and it turns out i aint getting thursday off. So basically i'm working monday, tuesday, wednesday, thursday, friday, saturday and possibly sunday.. basically the whole week. I did an extra hour tonight as a favour for someone, but that hour was the best hour in my day cause i was doing what i used to do. First time i've really smiled all day. But i go to work tomorrow dreading another long day. Suppose that's all i have to say for now..

Minnie Mouse


Which DISNEY character are you most like?
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Beyond Childhood Eyes

The presence of the light shone in my room, as I tried to shield my glowing cheeks, which themselves could fill the room with light. Life seemed nothing more than a confusion of images and objects, which I never understood; yet I saw life as a challenge, a voyage, an adventure. The more I grew, the needier I felt to discover life beyond my garden gate. I, a child of three, was confused and excited all at once by people, yet now they have truly influenced my young mind, which was at one stage completely out of control.

I saw life as I wanted to see it, drawing pictures of people happy, without a problem in their lives, and animals having tea parties, but for some reason, this was never how it turned out. My childhood discoveries kept growing and I was learning more, every time I found something innovative.

The blossom-filled air scented with the sweet aromas and muffled sounds of animals taking their shelter; I too was not going to let anyone change my ever-needing adventure, to enter my true compassionate and ‘mind-boggling’ childhood of how I saw the world. I sat and hoped that one day my discoveries could be shared with many others around myself, where they too could comprehend life through the eyes of a child.

I bobbed around like a rabbit, hopping through grass much taller than I was, hiding from large objects that came from nowhere. Buildings like towering wafers and traffic lights like giant colour changing lolli-pops, were only the beginning of an adventure and a cherished memory, taking me now back thirteen years of my life.

I dived, I hid, I screamed and I ran round the garden, sliding along the white blanket of pure, un-trodden snow and throwing balls of snow around myself. I played for hours and hours on end, painting pictures in this blanket, building round blobs that were supposed to be snowmen, and rolling around. I didn’t care that I was cold, for the joy from my laughter and fun kept me warm inside. My heart pounded like a drum against my chest. I was exhausted from running wild around my huge garden – weaving through trees and hiding behind my trusty snowmen. They were my friends now, I trusted them that they would shield me from flying white blobs coming from other people, and protect my hiding place. Something disturbed my fun that moment, yet I ran to my mother’s open arms where she took me and placed me in front of a warm fire.

I woke up early to see my new friends, but someone had stolen their snowy land and they too had moved on. I ran out side, only to see their existence had faded and hidden away like that of a cold, winter night’s fog. The gate was open; I took my steps and walked through. Nothing had changed. It was just another world of trees, grass, animals and people. My vivid dreams and imagination, ruined by the truth. There were no candyfloss trees, dreamy white chocolate oceans or animals having their tea parties, yet I carried on believing like some little kid on Christmas Eve waiting to see Santa Claus, even though it would never happen.

I suppose that day I woke to discover my snowy friends had gone was like the day I moved from my closest friends. I remember the day was bright, warm and the sky clear, minus the odd cloud bobbing around, trying to block the rays from the sunshine, but the sun was too powerful. I felt betrayed by everyone. They were stealing me away from where I grew up, where I learnt to behave and mostly where I made my friends. My hand flapped up and down, and the world came to an end, or so it seemed.

Later through my more matured years, as I grew and understood life more, a famous poet, Patience Strong once said:

In a garden green and gay,
all my troubles fade away,
sweet contentment here I find,
joy of heart and peace of mind.

I never really did appreciate these words before, yet now I have grown to understand what she really was trying to say – no matter where you go, you will always find a place in your garden where you can be safe. Feel safe. Through my mind, I saw things from a different perspective. I didn’t want the help from others to tell me the truth about the world, I wanted to learn for myself about the truth. Moving on doesn’t necessarily change the world, as my new garden lead to the cycle of life being just as much fun and equally adventurous. However, it meant finding new hiding places and becoming familiar with my new surroundings.

Later that year, my snowy friends came back – I knew they wouldn’t let me down. I believe that no matter where you are in the world, your true friends will always be there for you when you need them. My snowmen represent this importance to me. It’s something I will never forget, even for a young naïve child that I was.

The blinking of my eyes cannot fade a simple memory, but only time will tell how more a treasured memory this will remain and continue to live on, through the eyes of a child, yet also through the eyes of someone else.

by ME when i was 15! I just thought i'd put it here :)

Today was great fun. I got to spend the day with my amazing boyfriend! I swear he is the best person ever. I love him so much. It was a little chilly today, but i felt warm cuddled next to Eric in the cinema, and everywhere we went really. Went to the cinema twice and went in a couple of shops, went to costa and that was about it really. Dunno where the day went :O I'm so tempted to freeze time so that i could spend forever with Eric.

I realised something important today, other than the fact that i love Eric heaps (which i knew anyway) but i won't bother mentioning it. I just suppose i need to take care of a few things really.

Again it's really windy outside and i'm freezing. Eric phoned me tonight when i got in. Was great to talk to him. Apparently he thinks i'm his little shark ^o) I don't know how that's possible... i mean... i dont chew things and i don't bite :P *ahem* wooooo Eric.. actually... if u insist on calling me a shark, can i be a zippy shark? You seem to think i look like zippy as well.. :P

Anyway, bedtime i think. Been up since around 6am so i am rather tired.

Night =o)

This Is My Life, Rated
Life:	8.1
Mind:	7.2
Body:	7.5
Spirit:	7.5
Friends/Family:	7.4
Love:	7.7
Finance:	7.9
Take the Rate My Life Quiz

Strangeness :O

Today has seemed like a rather long day to be honest...

Been awake since 6:30am, and couldn't get back to sleep. I started work at 10 am and finished 5:30pm. Woooo today i had the cop radios and was on look-out for shop lifters, and was on the door. It was great. Really get to have a laugh as well as doing the job as best i can. I was also running up and down stairs all day, in the stock room, filling up the halloween stands etc. Seemed like the day went on forever.

Had lunch about 1:30, so i met up with a few of my friends for lunch.

Tonight I went out for a meal with marie helen, marie may, sophie, dawn and fiona. It was really nice. The twins are back off to france tomorrow morning, so it was good we got to do something with them whilst they were here =O) After the meal we went to a couple of pubs. At least it was warm there rather than us getting blown away! We all seemed pretty tired really, but still had a good time...

Work tomorrow..... and i'll update this again when i have something to talk about, but until then, bye bye!

Well... the end of freedom for me :O
For the last week i've had the house to myself. My parents and little sister went on holiday, and i decided to stay at home =O) So here's a rundown of the events that took place (if i havent already mentioned them before)

Sunday - In the morning they left for the airport, so i basically just had a lazy day, but had to tidy my room up a bit.

Monday - I met Eric at the train station in the morning, and then went back to my house.

Tuesday - spent another day with Eric until 6:30pm when he headed back home on the train. We had a great time.

Wednesday - Driving lesson, shopping and my sister came to stay the night. We went to tesco to get some stuff we wanted and had a look at music etc. Played the ps2 and watched 'Creep' which was pretty goddamn scary.

Thursday - Had my job induction which went really well and was quite fun =O) got to meet new people and watch training videos and have a tour of the building

Friday - lovely relaxing day off =O) to be honest i don't know where the day went, but it was fun. Played the ps2, watched telly etc

Saturday - i was in for till training at 9am, although it was meant to start at 9:30am. was on for 4 hours. It was great fun! At night a couple of friends came round for a girly night in - movies, gossip etc. It was great fun.

Sunday - that would be today. I just spent the day cleaning up from last night, relaxing, having a bath, really long sleep in, doing some ironing, general tidying up and putting things back where they belonged. Watched a few things on tv
I JUST SPOKE TO MY SIS, MUM AND DAD :) they just landed!! hehehe! yay they will be home soon, kinda missed them! Didn't really think i would, but i did! yay! anyhow.. time to go i think :) work tomorrow :)

I find myself feeling rather strange today. I can't be bothered getting up, although i should soon. I'm sat around in my nighty filling in another post before I clear up from last nights sleepover. Sadly, Dawn was ill so couldn't come and Rebecca was too tired, so soph, fiona and me had girly chats about guys, music, movies etc and watched Dirty Dancing. We also chatted to sophie's friend Tom last night. He seemed a really nice guy, but as usual i started talking about random crap.

 

Eric is working today, poor him =O( me thinks he should scive and come this way, hehehe :P I miss him. Now what am I gonna chew? *hmph*

 

I suppose i should go have a shower....or a bath would be goooood =O) bubbles!!!!

 

For all you depressed things out there, get over it and smile :P I'll set my pet donkey on you, he's intimidating, but very cute.................................. see .........

Today was so great. I went into work for 4 hours to do some till training. It was sooooo busy but it was great fun! Loads of people paid by cheques, credit cards, gift vouchers and cards, cash so i managed to get heaps of training in which was great. Everyone i work with is so friendly and a great laugh! Despite it being really busy, i served heaps of people and within minutes made several hundred pounds. Soo great! Anyway can't wait until monday, it's really my first proper shift. It will be exciting!!

Tonight I have a few friends coming round - Sophie, Dawn, Becca and Fiona. It will be fun. Hopefully we will be able to cheer fiona up anyway cause she failed her driving test. She's not too happy.

Finally, I'd just like to say that I love Eric sooooo much! Got to see him on his webcam last night which was great, kept making me smile..uhm then i fell asleep! nooo! I don't know how it happened hehe :O i wasn't even sleepy.

Anyway, enough of a ramble for today, I better clear my room up for later.

Today was my first day at meeting the Woolworths team and getting to meet the other few people who were just starting. I forgot some of their names, but there was Alison, Sarah, Fiona and another girl and a guy. They were all pretty crazy, a bit like myself really so i felt i fitted in just nicely :) Anyway, we watched various training videos and had a tour of the building, it's massive!! that took about 3 and a half hours to do all that, but it was fun :) Sadly i couldnt stay for the party they were having tonight cause i wouldnt have been able to get home! so unfair! *is happy* my wee honey updated his journal and dedicated the entry to me :) isn't he just sooooo special? *answer here*

Eric came today (well yesterday technically) so i've been with him all day. Right now he is sleeping, but taking up the whole bed ^o) dunno where i will be sleeping!! Evil. He has my favourite pillow :O maybe i could secretly kidnap that? I suppose that is possible. Aww he just looks so cute, but he's a stubborn git really and he knows it. I guess it was a bit strange seeing him for the first time in almost a month, but I feel so much happier for it. He's amazing, even if he doesn't think so himself. He refuses to update his journal, as always because one of his excuses is that he has nothing to write about. Do i ever have anything interesting really to write about? On the rare occasions where i actually do something interesting these days.

It's cold outside. I sat around for a bit at 1:30am, just because it's one of those random things i do. The music is playing in the background from Eric's Ipod, Eric is sleeping, the house is still, the village is still apart from the occasional lorry driving by at high speed. I'm sat here tapping away at the keys on my laptop, hoping they don't wake Eric up. This is day 2 of being left alone in the house, yet i get the pleasure of the company of my boyfriend. He's lay there looking helpless and innocent, yet i'm still sat here missing him. He's not even a meter away. I keep looking to see if he stirrs, or even opens his large blue eyes... I wait, but nothing seems to be happening. The smurfs song is now playing.. not heard those for ages :O how cool!

Another lorry drives by, I can almost feel the heat from the speeding tyres. I pause for a moment thinking and looking around the room. Goddamn that fly... it's been living in my room now for 3 days and it refuses to move. All you can hear most of the time is buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzz, yet you can't actually see where the noise is coming from. When me and that stupid fly come fact to face, it will wish it had never entered my room. I had a hot chocolate before, and i can still smell the warmth and comfort it is bringing me. My stomach hurts, I'm cold and need something to do. Why is it that when i'm bored I find myself writing in my journal just so it gives me something to do?

I guess i'm only on here updating this cause there is many events taking place as i type, plus i'm bored, wide awake and have nothing to do. Hell i even considered having a shower at 2am. I might have a shower yet, but i'll see what time it is when i've finished this thing.

I went for a walk earlier with Eric and my dog. Poor wee hunni she's getting so slow now cause she's old. So that took a while and i completely froze my ass off.

I'll end this here... Eric update your journal, or at least tell me what u thought of Monday and Tuesday ^o) that way i will know.

I GOT THE JOB!!! I'm so pleased =o) the guy that interviewed me, phoned me up today and offered me the job! This is so great... finally gonna have money again! wooo shopping.

Today I had a job interview for Woolworths. It was so great. It went really well so I am happy... The guy thought i'd be suitable for pretty much every position they had available cause he thought I was very friendly and seemed like a nice person :) we had a laugh too so that's a good sign. I just hope things go well and then i'll be getting money! I really do need it. Got to buy a new phone, and save up for christmas presents.

Parents and sister leave on Sunday for a week... WOOOOOOHOOOOOOOO! Can't wait.. sitting planning things right now so i better leave :D

Everything lately seems so different. Maybe I'm just paranoid? I trust people even less than I did weeks ago, but that's maybe because people give me reason to question what they're saying otherwise. How am i supposed to know the truth when I don't feel there's people I trust any more.. All i have is their word, and i suppose really that should be enough but I do take some convincing. You can't have friendship when there is no trust. You can't have love when there is no trust. Isn't that a strange concept? I suppose there are a few people i have grown not to trust as much as I used to, yet i'm still friends with them.

Sometimes you need to be told things you wish you'd hear, but you don't. Sometimes you find yourself trying too hard because you don't want to be pushed aside. The wind is a barrier stopping you reaching out to someone - it stops you finding out the truth and stops you having trust because you simply don't know which way it's gonna turn next.

My head is spinning as i sit here, wondering what to do, wondering where the next few days are going to take me. I trust myself, but is that really enough? I'm sick of not knowing certain things I wish i did. I have a feeling that sometimes makes me feel sick.. simply cause I don't know for certain about things any more.

Once my trust is someone is broken for good.. it will never return. I lost my trust in a friend.. now I know i can never trust that person because once trust is broken, it's bound to be broken again and again.

I think i will leave this here for a while. I must really do something a little more constructive. I love to write, but i am afraid it ends here..

I sit here now as the rain bounces off my window, the trees are almost blowing over as the high winds pick up... it's scary and so very cold outside. My fingers are burning from the cold..

This morning i woke up to a phone call to find out i have a job interview! I'm so pleased.. things seem to be going right for once. It seems like forever since things last went right for me.. what with trying to find a job and stuff.. but anyway, job interview is Thursday! *panics*

I could really do some random typing just to see where it takes me.. but i dont know what to write about.. my posts tend to get longer and longer everytime!! hehe! ummmmm yeah... sooooooo..

RANDOM!

Tonight was great fun.. a few friends and myself were celebrating 2 18th birthdays tonight which was great, although their birthdays were the other day. We went out for a meal to a restaurant. It was really nice. Wooo we got free party poppers off the people cause they knew it was a birthday thing! I decorated my hair with them and dawn made a wig out of hers ^o) insane i tell ya!

It was great fun to see some of my friends again, and sarah was down from Uni so got to see her too =o) did loads of gossipin anyhow.. that's to be expected though hehe!

Missing Eric heaps today, but i do every second I aint spending time with him. Hope you feel better soon honey *cuddles*